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Life lessons from Lobsters ​

There’s an interesting, urban myth about lobsters. When you cook a pot of male lobsters, you have to keep a lid on the cooking pot because when they realize they’re in a pot of boiling water, they try to escape even-though, they know it is futile. On the contrary, when cooking female lobsters, you don’t need to put a lid on the pot, as they don’t show such willingness to escape as they know there’s no point in fighting a fight, which they have already lost. So, they just hold their claws and brace each other for the impending doom.

Although, this is factually incorrect, as lobster have a ganglionic nervous system and they do not feel pain like us. In fact, boiling or steaming them is the most humane and quickest way to kill. Never the less, this myth still sites a good question about life. Should we die fighting or surrender to the whims of time?

Well, What I feel is, knowing when to surrender or quit is equally important as knowing how to keep on fighting or not giving up. Off course, perseverance and never backing down from a challenge are desired qualities, if you want to be successful in life, relationship or even career. After all, One can’t just give up! There are a thousand reasons for continuing with something past the point where you should stop. But perhaps it might be impossible to “just stop”. However, more often then not we consider perseverance to strive for gold as the only norm for being successful because giving up is labeled, trivial or cowardly. In my opinion, many of the “buts” are mostly a figment of the imagination. In fact, they are just a case of mis-staken identity. You, and your goals are two separate things. Never giving up, is just a load of bullshit that we have brewed ourselves, out of the fear of social judgment and prejudice on our own abilities. We sugarcoat the rationale for not backing off with a pretext of psychological comfort often attributing it to the fear of the unknown, aka atychiphobia or the self-inflicted need of not causing a social uproar by upsetting others, that too, just because we falsely and inconspicuous, assign safety and entropy to perseverance and persistence. This obsession with never giving up is not perseverance, for the lack of a better word it is actually blind persistence. It is this blind persistence that eventually turns any quest into an exhausting and useless ordeal.

Yes!, it is logical to think that, if we were to endure a little longer or persistently work on something, then maybe with time we will fix all the problems and reach our goals. But isn’t it also logical to think, that things don’t always go the way we want them too? Even if we work tirelessly, trying to make things right by overlooking the fact, that our very attempts to fix things might be having a negative impact on them as well as on us. So, instead of being persistent in such futile fixes and enduring the pain and ordeal of living through troubled times among other things, is it not sometimes imperative to give up, just plain, old and simple, “STOP”.

One may argue, Yes!, it is true to let go of our goals and other trivial quests since, they can be readily replaced with other and better ones, but what about jobs, relationships, and friendships? After all, they are not easy to come by, one must work for them if they want to be happy in life. To that I only say this, Sure, working toward a worthwhile goal is elating and exciting but the moment you lose excitement about your achievements you should understand that probably it is not what you wanted, it is just what you do as it is not catering to your innate desires. As Cloris Kylie says and i quote, “You’ve become used to striving and never arriving.”. Although knowing when to quit may seem a convoluted idea but think upon it, not giving up on a job, a relationship or friendships can more often than not, make you unhappy or even physically and emotionally ill. What good a job is, if you are just doing it for the money but have no other incentives or receive no recognition for it; what good a relationship is, if the partners are not committed to it or there is no room for love anymore; what good a friendship is, if you are the only one hooting for it.

If a quest takes over all other aspects of your life then you must learn to let go of it, life is meant to be enjoyed to the fullest; all thing that hinders this must be reconsidered by weighing their reason for continuation against that of life itself, because if you let your blind persistence overpower the aspects of your mental, emotional or physical wellbeing then any way you will lose all your physical strength as well as your coveted social assets like friends, family, and love.

OK, enough babel about why one should learn to give up, but how to determine, if it’s time to give up? The simplest and sure shot solution, that I can think of is, asking this question to yourself, What would be my life if I just stopped trying to solve it? And if, your inner aura answers, freedom and exhilaration then probably its time you gave up on it. Agreed that many things are iterative and demand continuous improvements and growth but at the same time, some things remand step changes and the decision to “give up” is one of those. So, it is important that you simply rip off the plaster on them. Painful, yes, but if you don’t, they will end up taking a huge chunk from your life, because just face it, continued work on a Gordian knot, expecting a solution with each iteration will ultimately lead to frustration and unbeknown you will begin to sabotage your own efforts.

It is always advisable to contemplate and reassess the outcome or needs of your goal and, if they seem realistic then you should see to their resolution. If not, it’s best that you reassess your commitment and avarice towards the goal in question. Don’t fall for the “what if ?” rouse. What if, I gave up now and then someone else did the same idea and got rich? What if, I just keep going another month? I recommend, to let your gut feeling guide you. You are most attuned to your intuition, learn to trust them and let them guide you to the places, you’re meant to go, the career you’re meant to have, and the people you’re meant to meet.

Speaking from personal experience, I spent half a decade working for a company, rejecting a job, I actually wanted to do because I had fallen into an agenda about the city I was in. Even-thought it was not stressful, but it sure was hard, my success was measured by random bets and the money was just decent. I was spending time on things that might work, not on things that were working. It was a good candidate to “give up”. The only advice I needed was to hear, “What the hell are you doing?, Just give up”. Not that it wasn’t offered, but perhaps, I didn’t listen, or maybe, I needed someone to give it to me straight. Although I didn’t waste my time there, but the prospect of being locked into something that was not working out, and was actually dragging me down was much worst. In the end, I quit, man was it hard. At first, it was horrible, there were a fair few failure-phobes, few who respected taking it easy more than trying and failing and even those who preferred the dull path. But I feed the inner best, my biggest asset – myself, by giving it up.

Sure, making the decision to give up is not be easy, may even cause you temporary pain, emotional trauma or remorse, but once you overcome these negative emotions, you’ll be able to welcome loving and uplifting thoughts into your life, opening a door to fulfilling and joyful life experiences, setting you on a path of learning, growth, and expansion!

So all in all, here are the 7 erogenous zones to touch when accessing whether to give it or not, not those of women, according to “Monica Gelllller :

  1. Just Listen to yourself
  2. Re-tally your numbers
  3. Get outside evaluation
  4. Be ready to rip off the plaster
  5. Take Atychiphobia head on
  6. Vanquish the “what if” worm, and
  7. Remember the cost of opportunity

7 erogenous zones ​in a women

Further Reading :

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फ़लसफ़ा – (Just a Teaser, Full version coming soon)

इस वक़्त का क्या है,
ये तो यूँ ही चलता रहेगा,
लम्हे, पहरों में और पहर दिनों बदल जायेंगे,
ये उम्र भले ही ना थमे पर आफ़सने थम जायेंगे।

………………….

रूह

काश कुछ ऐसा हो जाए

ये वक्त चलता रहे,

ये लम्हे चलते रहें,

ये पहर चलता रहे,

बस मेरी उम्र थम जाए।

मैं समेट लूँ सारी यादें,

मैं सहेज लूँ सारे पलों को,

देख लूँ जी भर के

उन आँखों को,

इस दुनिया में जिनसे सबसे पहले रूबरू हुआ।

मैं थाम लूँ उस ऊंगली को

जो कभी मुझे थामे चली थी।

वो खिलखिलाती हँसी

जो कभी मेरे साथ खेली थी।

बस इतनी सी ही तो ख्वाहिश है,

बे-वक्त के इस मुसाफिर की।

छोटी सी राह का जिसका

बस तीसरा हिस्सा है बाकी।।

आकर क़रीब अपनों के और थोड़ा,

कुछ और अच्छा कर जाऊँ।

छोटे से इस सफर के

सुकून भरे पलों को

यादों में पिरो जाऊँ।

या फिर

रहकर दूर उनसे,

ग़म के बवन्डर से बचाने को उनको,

बेरूखी वाला मुखौटा ओढ़ जाऊँ।।

रहगुज़र हूँ तेरा,

कि तूने जो भी दिया

झोली भर के दिया।

रहगुज़र हूँ तेरा,

कि दिये हुए हौसले से तेरे

अपने दम पर कुछ किया।

रहगुज़र हूँ तेरा,

कि कई ख्वाबों को अपने

मैंने हकी़कत में जिया।

रहगुज़र हूँ तेरा,

कि जरा से वक्त में ही

तेरे होने को समझ लिया।

ईबादतग़ार हूँ तेरा

शिकायतग़ार नहीं,

कि अलग बनाकर भी तूने

खास बना दिया।। — रूह

This poem is the best gift i have ever received from someone. someone whom i have grown to adore and respect not only for the fitful exuberance but also for the Indefatigable deftness in distilling soulful and picturesque emotion by the infallible sagacity in choice of words that eloquently succour the baroque and beguiling poems.

Thanks M ,

By the way this only of the poems from M rest assured 100’s more to come…..

झूठ, और उन झूठों को बोलने वाले झूठे

झूठ, और उन झूठों को  बोलने वाले झूठे
हम क्यों झूठ बोलते हैं?

यद्यपि झूठ को असहमति के साथ देखा जाता है और एक सामाजिक बुराई के रूप में माना जाता है, लेकिन झूठ निश्चित रूप से सामाजिक और जीवन के भौतिक पहलुओं का एक अभिन्न अंग है। समय के साथ, हम इंसानों ने इसे कला में रूपांतरित कर दिया है, कई अलग व्यक्तित्वों और रूपों वाले बहुमुखी कला में।

हालांकि हमारे पास लाखों बनावटी तथा छद्म-स्पष्टीकरण हैं कि हम झूठ क्यों बोलते हैं, लेकिन यह सब एक ही सार्वभौमिक सच्चाई पर आकर रुक जाते हैं और वह है कि हम महत्व की हमारी भावना को बढ़ाने के लिए झूठ बोलते हैं। हम उन चीज़ों को प्राप्त करने के लिए झूठ बोलते हैं जिन्हें अन्यथा इनकार किया जाएगा, हम सजा से बचने के लिए झूठ बोलते हैं, या शायद हम झूठ बोलते हैं क्योंकि हमें काल्पनिक से तथ्य का भेद नहीं पता।
झूठ का जो कुछ भी कारण हो, एक बात एक संदेह की छाया से परे है, हालांकि हम निश्चित रूप से हमेशा सच्चाई जानते हैं, जानते हैं कि सच्च क्या है और झूठ क्या परन्तु झूठ सभी मानव घटनाओं में इतना प्रचलित हो गए हैं कि लोगों को सबसे अधिक विरोधाभासी झूठों के लिए भी सरल स्पष्टीकरण मिल गयें हैं। झूठ का तथ्यों के विरूपण के साथ कुछ भी लेना-देना नहीं है, अपितु मानव भावनाओं और गर्व से सब कुछ है। झूठ तो असल में अहंकार और आत्ममोह का प्रतिबिंब है। लोग हमेशा, राजनेताओं और प्रचारकों को झूठ का प्रतीक मानते हैं, लेकिन क्या यह पक्षपाता नहीं ? आख़िरकार झूठ तो सभी बोलतें हैं ।
यूँ तो झूठ की अपनी कोई विशेषता नहीं होती ,लेकिन इसे झूठ बोलनेवाले की विशेषताओं द्वारा आसानी से पचाना जा सकता है। और शयद इसीलिए हमनें झूठ को नहीं, बल्की झूठों को वर्गीकृत किया है।
हमारे पास हैं :-
कुख्यात झूठे : जो झूठ को सच्चाई की जगह पारित करने के ईमानदार प्रयासों के बावजूद, अपनी घृणित प्रतिष्ठा से ही जानें जाते हैं। ये सिर्फ़ एक अजनबी को ही बेवकूफ़ बना सकते हैं, परन्तु वो भी लंबे समय तक नहीं।
माँझे हुए झूठे: इन्होंने झूठ बोलने की कला में महारथ हासिल की है। ये अव्वल दर्जे के और सहजवृत्ति वाले झूठे होते हैं, यह असंभव है कि कोई भी इनके जैसी निपूर्णता के साथ झूठ बेल सके। इनके झूठों को हमेशा सफलता का ताज पहनाया जाता हैं, क्योंकि ये अपने शब्दों से किसी भी श्रोता को मंत्रमुग्ध कर सकते हैं। श्रोता जाने-अनजाने में इनके हर झूठ को सत्य के सुसमाचार के तैर पर में मान लेते हैं।
छंटे हुए झूठे : झूठ से इनको अभेद्य प्रेम तथा एक प्रकार की अपरिहार्य दासता है। इनके झूठों को अकसर पकड़ा जा सकते हैं, इसके बावजूद झूठ बोलतें हैं।
कट्टर झूठे : ये आदत के जीव हैं। अब झूठ न बोलना सीखना इनके लिए बहुत मुश्किल है। झूठ ने अपनी जड़ों को गहराई तक मजबूती से बांटा है, जो की इनकी आदत का रूप ले चुकी है। उनके लिए झूठ बोलना सुबह की चाय या कॉफी और टोस्ट लेने जैसा है ।
जन्मजात झूठे: इनका मिथ्याकरण का इतना लंबा इतिहास है कि कोई नीसंदेह कह सकता है, की जब ये अपनी मां के गर्भ में पुनर्वास कर रहे थे तब इनका उपाध्यक्ष शुरू हुआ। दूसरे शब्दों में, और प्रभाव के लिए अतिशयोक्ति का उपयोग करते हुए आप कह सकते हैं की ये अपने जन्म के क्षण से झूठ बोल रहे हैं।
झूठ के आदी झूठे: इन्हें कोई फर्क नहीं पड़ता, ये कभी भी झूठ बोलना बंद नहीं करते। लोग अवसरों पर या अक्सर विशेष कारणों से झूठ बोलते हैं, लेकिन ये लगातार झूठ बोलते हैं, कभी-कभी या कभी-कभी नहीं, अधिक से अधिक झूठ बोलते हैं।
तर्कहीन झूठे : इन्हे एक आजीब बीमारी है। इनको सच्च और झूठ के बीच के अंतर की चिंता नहीं होती , और न ही ये तथ्यों को फंतासी से अलग करने के लिए परेशान होते हैं। वास्तव में, इनका झूठ बोलना एक लाइलाज़ बीमारी की तहर है , जिसको किस भी एंटीबायोटिक या दवा से ठीक नहीं किया जा सकता।
निर्लज्ज झूठे : ये बेशरम होते हैं, इनके लीए इन्हें मायने नहीं रखता, कि इनके झुठों के कारण निर्दोष पीड़ितों को क्या-क्या झेलना पड़ता हैं। इन्हें तो इसका पछतावा तक नहीं होता। पूरी तरह से बेईमान, इन वक्तियों से घुलना-मिलना खतरनाक होता हैं।
निपुण झूठे: इनके पास एक जीवंत कल्पनाशक्ति और लप-लपाती ज़ुबान होती है , ये तथ्यों को आसानी से तोड़-मरोड़ लेते हैं मनो जैसे अपना नाम कह रहें हों। हालांकि ऐसा नहीं है की इनका झूठ हमेशा पकड़ा नहीं जाता पर, फ़िर भी, इनकी हर बात को हमेशा संदेह से देखा जाता है। ये इतने हाज़िर ज़वाब होते हैं की अक्सर इनके उत्तरों को सच मानने में कठनाई होती है। भले ही आप इनके झुठों को तुरंत पकड़ लें, परन्तु आप पिछले बुरे अनुभव से यह जानते हैं की, जब ये बात कर रहें हो तो महत्वपूर्ण संकायों को निलंबित नहीं करना चाहिए। यूँ तो लोग इनकी चुस्त बुद्धिमत्तता की प्रशंसा करते हैं लेकिन इनको हमेशा संदेहास्पद स्वरों से ही सुनते हैं।
झूठ कैसा भी हो, वे बुरा ही है, और अक्सर अन्य लोगों के लिए हानिकारक होते हैं, परन्तु कभी-ना-कभी किसी विशेष रूप में आप पर भी खतरनाक प्रभाव दाल सकता है। अच्छे में अच्छा, यदि आपके झूठ को पकड़ लिया जाए तो केवल आपको कुछ शर्मिन्दगी भुगतनी पड़ती है। जबकि बुरे में बुरा, यदि आपको अपने धोखे में सफलता मील जाये तो पर भी, आपके चरित्र की ही विकृत होती है और ऊसूलों को छत्ती पहुँचती है।
संक्षेप में, सभी झूठ हानिकारक हैं, पर ये अनैतिकता से कम नहीं। यदि आप इनमें से किसी एक तरह के भी झूठे हैं, तो भी आपके सभी झूठ –  निन्दनीय, अनुमानीत , पूर्वनिर्धारित, नीस्नेह और जानबूझे हैं।
झूठों का वर्गीकरण वर्ड पावर नोर्मन लुईस, 1 9 4 9 [आईएसबीएन: 8183071007], से प्रेरित

 

Lies, and the lying liars who tell them

Lies, and the lying liars who tell them

Why do we lie? Even though lies are frowned upon and considered as a social evil but lies are most definitely an integral part of social as well physiological aspects of life. Over the ages, we humans have morphed it into art. In a multifaceted art-form with several distinct personalities and forms. We have millions of made-up or pseudo-explanations on as to why we lie, but it all boils to the same universal truth and that is we lie to increase our sense of importance.

We lie to gain what would otherwise be denied. We lie to escape punishments, or perhaps we lie because we don’t know facts from fancy. Whatever be the reason for such falsifications, one thing is beyond a shadow of a doubt, we are most certainly always aware of what is truth and what is a lie. Lies have become so prevalent and all to a human phenomenon that people have now found simple explanations even for the most contorted lies.

Lies have nothing to do with distortion of facts, but everything to do with human emotions and pride. They are essentially a reflection of egotism and narcissism. We always consider politicians and lobbyist as an epitome of lies, but is not this biased? after all, everyone tells lies. As such, lies don’t have characteristics of their own, but that of the liar. Perhaps that’s why, we have classified the liars, and not the lies.

We have
Notorious Liar: Who, despite their sincere efforts to pass lies as truth, are known only by their unsavory reputation. They may fool strangers, but then not for long.

Consummate Liar: They have mastered the art of lying. They are the top-drawer and most convincing liars in all classical and instinctive sense, it’s impossible that anyone could lie with such perfection. Their lies are always crowned with success as they can mesmerize any listener with their words. The listeners knowingly or unknowingly believe every lie as the gospel of truth.

Incorrigible Liar: They have an irredeemable slavery and impervious love for lying. Often as they may be caught, they lie despite such irrefutable consequences.

Inveterate Liar: These are the creatures of habit, too old to learn new tricks now. Lies have firmly pronged their deep roots, as a habit into them. Lying for them is like taking morning tea, coffee or toast.

Congenital Liar: An early starter. You have such a long history of persistent falsification that one can only suspect, that your vice started when you were reposting in your mother’s womb. In other words, and allowing for a deal of exaggeration for effect, you have been lying from the moment of your birth.

Chronic Liar: No let-up, you never stop lying. People lie on occasions or often for special reasons, but you lie continually, not occasionally or even frequently but over and over again.

Pathological Liar: They have a strange disease. They are not concerned about the difference between truth and false, nor are they bothered about separating facts from fantasies. In fact for them, lying is an incurable disease, which can not be cured with antibiotics or medication.

Unconscionable Liar: They have no regrets and are completely without a conscience, no matter what misery their fabrications may cause to innocent victims, they never feel the slightest twinge of guilt. Totally unscrupulous, they are dangerous people to get mixed up with.

Glib Liar: They Possessed a lively imagination and a ready tongue, they can distort facts as smoothly and as effortlessly as if they are saying their name. It’s unlikely that their lies are never caught but Ironically enough, this very smoothness always makes them suspects. Their answers are too quick to be true. Even if we immediately catch their lies, we have learned from unhappy past experience not to suspend our critical faculties when they are talking. People do admire their nimble wit but, then again they listen to them with a skeptical ear.

Egregious Liar: All Lies, after all, are bad they, are frequently injurious to other people and may have a particularly dangerous effect on you as a liar. At best, if their lies are caught, they only suffer some embarrassment. At worst, if they succeed in their deception, then their character gets distorted and their sense of values suffers. In short, their lies are so outstandingly hurtful that people gasp in amazement and are disgusted at hearing them.

Almost all lies are harmful, and nothing less than vicious. If you are one type of liar, all your lies are vicious ~ calculatedly, predetermined, coldly, and advisedly immoral.

Hey guys, i am also working on hindi translations of all my post.

Starting from this one

Clasification of liars, Inspired by : Word Power Made Easy by Norman Lewis, 1949  [ISBN: 8183071007]

What is Life? 2.0

What is Life? 2.0
What is life? Isn’t it an abyss full of unrealized dreams and shattered hopes. You may spend an eternity, it’s improbable that you will ever be able to comprehend its grandness or the sheer scale of it. Even if you have the courage to scale its depths to piece together those shattered hopes and unrealized dreams, it will still be an incongruous endeavor.

Nothing matters, you will always remain insouciant and capitulated in a quotidian disarray praying, maybe the next day will better than today. The more you will try, the harder it will become, to end this perpetual commotion and slumber of thoughts or to gaze into that rabbit hole. In fact, a will of steel and wit of a child is needed, to even garner courage of peeping into that bleak hole.
Your inner-voice keep on saying, not to get too bothered, but the bickering world never stops meddling, unless you jump into this chasm. But, the moment you leap over the ledge and plunge into this darkness, a never-ending stream of thoughts overwhelms you. And suddenly you realize that this realm of darkness is not all black, but there’s something to it that is surreal, almost dreamlike.
A dream from which you don’t want to wake up. Though the sense of euphoria accompanying this endless emptiness feels almost haunting and you think maybe you were content without exploring, but in reality, you were much more curious than a 2-year-old child. The adrenaline rush now fuels your inner self to go deeper. And as you go deeper you become more conscious and confident that you are the king of this realm, all you had to do, was try, try what nobody ever tried. The moment you realize this, you will see the darkness giving way to light, and there’s a mirror at the bottom of this never ending Abyss.
It’s you looking at yourself staring at the skies, from the bottom of a well. Staring at a vanilla sky full of hopes, dreams, and aspirations.
Read the original here : What is Life

What is Excitement

The anticipation of something new or unknown is always much more euphoric than that thing itself. Your imagination goes into a frenzy, painting vivid and ebullient pictures of the events about to unfold. You feel giddy, butterflies start titillating your innermost desires, enticing feelings like that, of a new love or the passion of a consummated one. Summoning emotions that transcend mendacity of this pretentious world, absolving you of your dark desires. Yielding an amalgamation of thoughts with emotions & desires that elates you into a trans, as if you have achieved nirvana and are ready to ascend to a final abode.

Excitement is a drug so powerful that even morphine seems like an overrate artisanal water. The whirlwind of thoughts, comotion of emotions and beguilement of desires, that it entrails are like the ubiquitous longing of a chronic methhead. You start contemplating the improbable; imploring to elements to incite time dilation. So, that you can have both the physical and the metaphysical experiences at once.

Though it is hard to comprehend or possibly explain such longings. Perhaps our inner child could explain it as we adults are overly-cautious and intensely disturbed about the directions of our own thrills. Unfortunately and Ironically, the baroque explanations pulled from deepest childhood memories, are so odd to ourselves, that we unwittingly try to repress them.

Enthusiasms arising from excitement is so overwhelming that we thwart for in its obviation. This may sound odd but this enthusiasm is in fact motivated by a search for extrication of truth and eloquence. It not only paints a utopian perspective of things about to unfold but, also provides solutions to the thing we fear; making us feel more at ease, more relaxed and true to ourselves.